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Respite For the Weary
Whew, adult-parenting is tough.
Whew, nobody forewarned me about "adult children." The term alone is an oxymoron. Our kids are "all gown up," out there in the world, but our hearts are as bound to them as when we were holding them in our arms as infants.
So, how do we love them well at this juncture in their lives?
Having been in this stage now for over a decade, with two children in the 20's and two in their 30's, plus gaining 3 more children with their respective spouses, I have had plenty of opportunity to experience trial and error in parenting on this journey. Along with their triumphs and blessings each child has also gone through heartache, hardship, and loss in some way. (One year in particular was even labeled "the year of tears" by two of my children. A tough year for sure.) Watching them go through these things is hard on a momma's heart.
When looking at this journey in an overarching way, I have 3 insights that God continues to remind me when navigating my adult children's highs and lows:
1. Be patient. I must remember that God is not done. He is always working. When I think of my own life-experience as a 20-30 year-old, I marvel at both my immaturity and insecurity. But this is where God met me. He was gracious and compassionate in my toddler-like-walk with him. He used my circumstances (dashed dreams as an athlete, loneliness as a resident's wife, sadness of 2 miscarriages, drama in my family of origin) to cause me to run to him. He wooed me to his love. He used ALL of these things to mature me, showing me that he is my ALL in ALL. I must remember and take hope that he will do the same for each one of my children.
2. Be prudent. Set healthy boundaries...no helicoptering. I've learned that when they are ready, they'll talk. I need to be a safe place for them to share their heart, listening first, all the while praying for the Lord to speak his wisdom through me. I must resist the strong temptation to fix it for them, whatever "it" is. The best thing I can ever do for them is to point them to Jesus. His word is life-giving in every way.
3. Be prayerful. Prayer is never wasted time, whereas worry is only that. So I must remember to keep prayer as a daily priority; my words to God about my children are loving my children in supernatural ways. This morning I was convicted to get on my knees for one of my adult children in particular. God can do things that I certainly cannot! Ask without doubting and wait expectantly for his answers. Don't forget to thank him when and how he chooses to answer. Share with your children all that you see that God is doing in their lives. It will strengthen their faith.
Be patient.
Be prudent.
Be prayerful.
Your adult children are a beautiful work in progress, as are we.
I want to share a post I wrote for an on-line ministry called Soul Sisters. If you think you would like this type of a daily devotional and a community of women of faith, I invite you to join us: https://www.facebook.com/groups/752566431555141/?ref=shareWednesday, March 18God of WondersOh give thanks to the Lord, call upon His name; make known His deeds among the peoples. Sing to Him, sing praises to Him; speak of all His wonders. 1 Chronicles 16:8-9Heartbeat of God, page 155In our header verse God gives us some instructions to follow concerning His wonderful works:we are to give thanks,we are to call upon His name,we are to make known His deeds,we are to sing praises, andwe are to speak of all His wonders.Today, let's simply obey His word. Instead of allowing our minds to enter into and dwell on this current world-wide panic, let's stop and refocus our gaze on the Lord. What are things in His creation (or in your own personal life) that you consider a wonderful work of God? The list is limitless for both of us. Here are a few topics to get your mind going:a wonder in His vast creationa wonder in a miraculous healinga wonder in a "chance" meetinga wonder in a person's unique giftinga wonder in a new believer.After lots of thinking, I have picked the wonder of God's...sunrise.Since the beginning of creation, the sun has "risen in the east and set in the west." The radiance and consistency of God's sun declares His beautiful faithfulness on the behalf of His people.The thing is, when we stop and consider the wonders in His world, it will all too often leads us to think about the wonders in His word. For example, the rising of the sun helps me to remember the rising of the Son! Jesus broke through the darkest of dark and He consistently brings light to my sometimes very weary soul each new day--now that is a wonder all on it's own!Today, let's refix our gaze. Let's turn from diseased-ridden thoughts to God of Wonder praise. Pick something to speak or sing about and make it known to us on Soul Sisters or to a friend face to face. What in God's world amazes you? Or, has He performed a "wonder" in your life that you can share with thanksgiving? Who knows, our voluntary praise to the God-who-is-in-control may just be a contributing factor in snuffing out the evil in this world.So friends, allow the Son to rise today... through you.For further reading: Lamentations 3:22-24; Psalm 33:6-9; Job 37:14; Psalm 1:3; Philippians 2:15; Matthew 7:24-27; Psalm 111:2-4God, You are the God of Wonders. You are wonderful in Your works and You are wonderful in Your word! Show us how these two things intermingle so that Your creation speaks truths to our hearts. Awaken our sleepy eyes to the things around us that are truly amazing. Stir our forgetful minds to remember marvelous things You have done for us in our personal lives. As a result, may we each praise You with a new song in our soul. Great are You Lord! Amen.
I want to extend a welcome invitation to each of you to a retreat that I will be speaking at the first weekend in April. It is called Restore Moms Retreat and it is open to any mom of any age. (That means grandmothers are invited too!).Here are more details from Lisa Samford, the founder of Restore Moms:"Restore is a Christian moms retreat, founded on Matthew 11:28, 'Come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.' The goal of the 3 day retreat is to help moms find restoration through Jesus and community with other moms."All inclusive: Meals, lodging, worship, guest speakers, play and relaxation for only $250.
Main Speaker: Chris Baxter
Event Dates: Friday, April 3 (4pm) through Sunday, April 5 (noon)
Event Location: Camp Garner Creek/ 700 Sam Hollow Rd/ Dickson TN 37055
Register today: RestoreMomsRetreat.com
Questions: RestoreMomsRetreat@outlook.com
I hope to see some of you in April!
I came across a great passage on prayer through my current devotional book called Forty Days of Prayer by Kit Cummings. Here are the verses and some of my thoughts:
The word of the Lord came to me, saying,
"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."
"Alas, Sovereign Lord," I said, "I do not know how to speak; I am too young."
But the Lord said to me, "Do not say, 'I am too young,' You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you.," declares the Lord.
The the Lord reached out his hand and touched my mouth and said to me, "I have put my words in your mouth. See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to plant." Jeremiah 1:4-10In the above passage, God and Jeremiah are dialoging with each other. Before I write about anything else in this post, let us remember that prayer is not merely a one way conversation in which we are the only ones talking; rather, He too has something to say to us. He speaks to us every day through His word and His spirit. So, let's use the words above as His dialogue not only to Jeremiah, but also to our very own hearts today. What is the Lord saying through His living and active words? Here are a few things I "hear" that are for you and for me. God says:
We are today's Jeremiah. (We are also today's David, today's Samuel, today's Moses, today's Ruth, today's Esther...for such a time as this!) Allow God's interaction with these people of old to be the inspiration for His appointed purposes in you TODAY. What He said to them in the past, is now for our hearts in the present. Let's continue to bring all our prayers to Him, big and small, but also, let's hang around long enough to hear His words back to us. What is He asking you to do today for His name sake? Write a note to a friend? Make a meal for a neighbor? Visit a widow?
Reread the list above and walk forward in obedience with great faith. And let me remind you, God is just as pleased with a note of encouragement to one person as He is with someone speaking to the masses. Both are important callings, but He never "keeps count" of what's "more worthy" the way we humans tend to do. He sees the heart and smiles at our devotion to Him. (Think of the widow's mite found in Luke 21:1-4).
Let's all be today's Jeremiah. Dialogue with God, receive His incredible promises, and then do something for Him...today.
I have a friend who expressed how she wished that her family could somehow all be "on the same page" with each other. Oh how I want that for my family as well! I'm sure you may feel this longing about your loved ones, or your co-workers, or even the people you serve with in ministry.
One way to bring about strong unity is through consistent prayer for one another. I have written short Scripture-based prayers for this very purpose. Here are 2 of 365 examples:
Counselor. I will instruct you and teach you the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you (Psalm 32:8). Dear Lord, You know the best path for each of us. Keep our eyes fixed on You. Give us willing hearts to trust and obey Your guidance as we step forward in faith each new day.
Peace. Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give you; do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid (John 14:27). Dear Lord, Your peace is truly the only real rest for our souls. Everything else is a temporary anesthetic. By your Spirit, breathe into us a divine calmness, not to sedate us to inactivity, but to inspire us to share Your incomprehensible peace with the world.
If you would like to receive these prayers in your email, then please subscribe to "Daily Prayers" on my website: http://www.RespitefortheWeary.com. Ask your family members, co-workers, or ministry partners to subscribe as well so that you and "your people" can claim the same name of God and bible verse over each other on a daily basis.
God's name and Word are powerful. Claim it together and receive His blessing.
There's no better place to be than on His Same Page.
My daughter Maggie is due with her first baby any day now. Her sister Emmy came to Chicago for a few days, hoping to be present for the birth, but little Hally Christine isn't quite ready to make her grand appearance... yet.We're all waiting.Waiting is hard, isn't it? I know we all have had circumstances that have brought us to crying out, "I want it NOW!" (whatever it is). This is the thing, while we are waiting for something, we are also waiting with something, and we get to choose what that something is. For example, we can be:waiting with expectancywaiting with frustrationwaiting with hopewaiting with impatiencewaiting with joywaiting with despair.As you are waiting for something, what are you waiting with? Today, as I am waiting for the birth of my first grandchild, I want to wait with expectancy, with hope, and with joy. Just like a little embryo takes time to develop and grow before her right time to enter the world, our faith also has to mature before we receive what we are longing for. It's important to remember that while we are waiting, two things are happening: we are growing in our dependence on the Lord AND God is working out His best plans for each one of us.So, while you are waiting for something, allow God to teach you about Himself. Learn to trust Him more. Believe He is at work. Wait with....you choose. And then, at the divinely appointed time, God will birth exactly what He knows is best for you.Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Psalm 33:20-21In the morning, Lord, You hear my voice; in the morning, I lay my requests before You and wait expectantly. Psalm 5:3
Not too long ago, I came across one of my favorite Bible stories. It's found in 2 Chronicles 20:1-22. I encourage you to take three minutes to read it.To paraphrase, Judah was being attacked on all sides. King Jehoshaphat was afraid and set his face to seek the Lord (2 Chronicles 20:3). He called the people of Judah together and lifted up his voice to the Lord in a desperate prayer, saying, O our God...we do not know what to do but our eyes are on you. The earthly problem and then the divine outcome is remarkable.Tucked inside this story is my theme verse for 2020. The verse's meaning and it's reference (chapter 20, verse 20) is what led me to claim it:... Believe in the Lord your God, and you will be established; believe his prophets and you will succeed. 2 Chronicles 20:20.These words were powerfully spoken to God's people thousands of years ago, and they are just as alive today. We are called to put our full faith in the Lord our God; and we are called to believe in His word. (Back then God spoke through His prophets; today, He speaks to us through His Son, who is the Word--see Hebrews 1:10). When we do these two things and act on them in faith, we are promised two things: we will be established and we will succeed.So on January 1 and February 17 and April 28 and June 7 and August 22 and October 15 and December 11 and every day in between and after that, remember these two simple things: believe God; believe His word. If you truly believe in both the power and the love of God, you will then truly believe in the Words; therefore, the next logical step is to obey Him wholeheartedly. And just like King Jehoshaphat and his people were rewarded back then, you will be blessed in ways you would not have imagined...all because you lived out your faith.Spiritual "2020 vision" is believing God, and believing His word. Let's look forward to being established and succeeding this year as we live out our faith moment by moment.
The he said to them, "But who do you say that I am?" And Peter answered, "The Christ of God." Luke 9:20
Dear Lord Jesus,
You ask each one of us, "Who do you say that I am?" The way we answer this question will dictate our lives. Calling you Lord and Savior means trusting and obeying your word. Please help us to live and love like you. In your Name, Amen.