All Writings

Marriage Tip: Love and Respect Hold Hands

Culture has given the biblical phrase “wives respect your husbands” a negative connotation. We have been told that if we don’t fight for the leadership position, then we are in the “lesser than” role.

Depreciating one’s identity is not what God intended for wives AT ALL, so this kind of “respect” is not what I am talking about in this post. I’m referring to God’s best way for both husband and wife to receive what they long for most from each other. God knows women desire LOVE and men want RESPECT. He designed husband and wife to give them to each other. Love and respect hold hands.

Over the years of my marriage, which has certainly had its ups and downs, I have learned that respecting my husband Mac has opened the door for him to love me. Some characteristics of respect are: listening to him, praying for him, encouraging him, not shaming him, and following him. These choice actions soften his heart toward me. When I have had a willing spirit to follow him, he in turn asks me what I think about an important decision. The opposite is also true, if I’m snappy with my words and stubborn with my plans, things don’t go well for either of us.

I have not lost my identity over these three decades. Actually, Mac has helped me learn to “fly” in ways I never would have on my own. (See my 2 minute video, Tip #9, about this on my Facebook page at Respite for the Weary.

Wives, I encourage you to respect your husbands in the way that God is talking about in His word. When you do this, you are giving him the best opportunity to love you. Turn the knob of respect to open the door of his heart. In doing so, the two of you will hold hands as you walk through life together.