All Writings


And by the seventh day God completed His work which He had done; and He rested on the seventh day from all His work …
~Genesis 2:2

Dear Molly,

I encourage you to allow Ryan to freely pursue a hobby. Over the years, I have discovered that Mac’s temporary absence has brought him more energy when he is physically present. He will appreciate you when you give him the freedom to go and enjoy. Give him time to relax in an enjoyed setting.

I must admit, in the early years of marriage, this “hobby idea” was much more difficult than it is today. There were times I had to force a friendly smile when he walked out the door to go play golf or go hunt. We learned together how to give to each other. Here are some guidelines to pray for and discuss with Ryan concerning time away from home:

1. Pray his outlet would not become more time-consuming than it should be. Discuss with Ryan a reasonable amount of time to be away from you and the children. This time will vary over the years. For example, Mac used to hunt alone, leaving all four young ones behind with me (these were my “forced-smile” years). But now, both boys and sometimes Emmy can go enjoy with him. So the amount of time away has lengthened. And instead of saying, “hurry home,” Maggie and I say, “take your time!”

2. Pray his outlet would bring him godly friends to keep him accountable throughout his life. I am humbly thankful to God for the incredible friends Mac has gained through hunting. They speak truth into him, which is a blessing to me.

3. Pray his outlet would make him a better husband and a better daddy when he comes home. Pray that God would use this time to work in his heart – to refill and refresh him to “get back in the game” of life.

Now Molly, in the same way you are showing Ryan love by giving him “time,” I encourage you to ALSO TAKE THIS KIND OF TIME FOR YOURSELF. You, too, need refreshment from the everyday-life routine. Do not neglect yourself in this way – it’s easy to do, so be careful. Again, pray and discuss with Ryan the guidelines concerning your outlet.

Give time away; enjoy time away; and then, love time together.

Love, Chris

How precious is Thy loving-kindness, O God!
And the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Thy wings.
They drink their fill of the abundance of Thy house;
And Thou dost give them to drink the river of Thy delights.

~Psalm 36:7-8